Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I Hereby Resolve....



It's that time of year. An old year ends, a new begins and one can't seem to help but make at least a few New Year Resolutions.  Why do we do this to ourselves? We know from sad experience the disappointing sound of old resolutions popping like so many champagne bubbles, floating out of our reach and falling, spent, to the ground.  I don't think it's our fault, really, that so many intended changes don't happen.  I think we just don't get how to make them real.  Our goals tend to be too big, too unweildy, like the 7 of cups, big ideas with no foundation.  We want to "lose weight" but we don't know how much and we only have a vague idea how to do that.  We want to "get a better job" but only go as far as revamping our resume and looking through the first few weeks of classifieds or signing up with an online job search engine and after the fifteenth "Get Rich Making Money At Home!" email we block the spam.  Whether the resolution is to stop smoking, learn a new skill, take up a hobby, or even reconnect with old friends, we have the best of intentions but somehow the passion dissipates somewhere in February, if it lasts that long.

What happens to those intentions?  It dawned on me today as I was writing something on the grocery list that I perpetually keep on my refrigerator that writing that list is an act of intention.  Making that list doesn't result in the items appearing in my kitchen but only specifies what I need to manifest there.  The actual manifestation will involve physically going to the store and purchasing the items then bringing them back to my apartment.  But making the list is an important step.  I have shopped without a list before and I've done alright, but the chances of not manifesting a few items are pretty high.  Some people thrive on lists, to do lists and such.  I'm the sort that takes the list to the store then forgets it in the car.  But I have been in the store, list-less, and have closed my eyes and visualized the list and been able to remember what was on it.  The very act of writing it down seals it in my memory, and if I'm lucky I can recall it.  So even if I don't carry the list with me, the writing helps a lot with seeing the intention through.  So I should think step one in making a valid New Year Resolution would be to Write It Down.

I've had that perpetual grocery list for many years.  I remember when my oldest was in high school and his girlfriend Jessica once surprised me by writing her desired item on the list.  She wasn't even at the house when I saw it and it made me laugh out loud.  There, nestled between bread, milk, cheese, and laundry detergent was her request for a pony.  Since then, my kids have randomly written their wishes on my grocery list and it's still amusing to see the unlikely items they'd like me to pick up at the grocery store.  There's a second clue about making viable New Year Resolutions: make them realistic.  While there may come a day when Super WalMarts carry ponies, that day is not today, at least not in my town, so I would have to limit my list to that which I can reasonably assume would be sold there.  So I need to make my intentions realistic and achievable.

Beyond the shopping list approach, I don't usually have to concern myself too much with the "hows" of grocery shopping.  Not so with my other goals in life.  If I want to lose weight, for example, I need to break that goal down into smaller achievable goals that I can reach on a daily basis.  Drink more water.  How much more? Write it down.  Eat fewer meals out.  How few? One night a week? A month?  Exercise more.  How much more? Walk daily.  When? How far?  Write it all down.

If you're having trouble sorting out in your mind exactly what goal you want to make your priority, tarot can lend a hand.  Ask the deck to choose a goal for you and then draw a card.  Once you interpret the goal, draw more cards to show three things you can do to reach that goal.  Draw cards again to show the pros and cons of each path to the goal.  Tarot is a fantastic tool for brainstorming and for getting to the unsurfaced subconscious desires.  The thing with manifesting anything in your life is that you have to really want it.  I mean really, really want it.  Because if you really don't give a crap then it's not going to happen because you just won't find the motivation to move it along.  For example, I've been saying I want a new car, but I'm nowhere near that goal.  I realized today that what I really want is a new laptop to replace the one with the motherboard that fritzed out after 18 months or a way to get that one fixed.  Now THAT I want.  Because sharing one computer between me and my boyfriend is, well, inconvenient.  And we can't play World of Warcraft together and that just sucks.  I've researched prices and specs on new laptops and have even decided on one I'd like to buy when I can.  I've researched and priced replacement motherboards for the old one and found them to be about 1/3 the cost of a new computer, but with labor will likely make repair the old one unreasonable.  I've looked into selling my old laptop for spare parts. I have put time and energy into the new laptop desire but virtually nada into the new car desire.  So pay attention to what you focus on and where you spend your energy and you may realize that what you think you want isn't what you truly want after all.  Get behind what you really want not what you think you want.


I found this helpful worksheet on The Road To Well Being website.  I thought it lent itself quite well to exploring one's desires and setting goals and I also thought it would work well with a tarot deck in hand.  Using the questions on the worksheet, or adding your own, ask these questions of your deck and see what you come up with.  I tried it and my first goal is the Six of Cups.  I interpreted that as getting back to what genuinely makes me happy, what used to make me happy, which I have let go a bit.  Returning to a love, following my bliss and blessing others in the process.  Three paths to that goal: The Magician, The Fool, and the Queen of Wands.  All viable options, but one is the best way.  So I clarified those and The Magician was clarified by the Page of Pentacles which means I would probably need to learn more, find out more, practice more, and it might require some investment.  The Fool got the two of cups which would mean I would need support and possibly a partner to pick up my broken pieces when I dashed myself on the rocks.  The Queen, however, got the Sun.  I'd say that was the more powerful and compelling option.  So in order to reach my goal I need to tune into my inner Queen of Wands, take charge of things around here and move into action with passion and commitment.  All of the options were good, but one was better.  Working down the list this way with the cards helps refine and clarify one's goals and maps out a viable path to making them happen.

Let's make 2010 a year in which we indeed follow our bliss, but better yet...find the way there.
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