We are all wanderers on this earth. Our hearts are full of wonder, and our souls are deep with dreams.

Tuesday, December 07, 2010

Tangled Webs We Weave
Relationship readings.  The boon and the bane of every tarot reader's practice.  I love them and I hate them.  I love them because I'm all about relationships.  People are so interesting and difficult to predict.  Even so-called "predictable" people are known to throw a definitive curveball on occasion.  The fascinating thing about relationship readings is they, too, can throw a distinct curve.  I am a woman who has seen her share of relationships and consider myself fairly knowledgeable about the tendencies and patterns of people.  But I am routinely surprised when tarot pipes in with some off the wall advice or outcomes to relationship questions.

Most often, the scenario that seems to unfold is that what appears to be the death knell of many relationships, tarot chimes in with, "It's not over."  It causes me, as a reader, many shakings of my head.  I sometimes wish it would say differently.  I wish it would just put the poor heartbroken client out of their misery.  But then, it's not up to me to pontificate on what I think would be best, that's not why my clients ask me to read tarot for them.  Still, even when tarot says, "It's not over," also does not mean there will be a happy ending.  At least not in the way one may imagine.  Many times I've seen, via my repeat clients, the story of a relationship unfold, one reading to the next.  Sometimes, when tarot says, "It's not over," is because the querant isn't ready for it to be over.  There may be unfinished business, not only between the couple, but most often, inside the querant themselves. One more round between them is exactly what my client may need before they can cleanly let go.  So just because a tarot reading may indicate that there is unfinished dealings between a couple, it doesn't mean the reconciliation is pending.

Predicting other people's behavior is really tough sometimes.  I have a spread that examines someone's thoughts, feelings, desires and likely actions in a relationship and there is almost always a glaring disparity between what someone wants versus what they will likely do.  I find that fascinating, but I am quick to remind my querants that I do often see that disparity and just because someone may want to be your Knight of Cups doesn't mean they will act on it.  Likewise, just because they may want to run away and never speak to you again doesn't mean they will.  The thing to remember, too, and this is crucially important, is that a relationship reading is primarily about you.  It's only secondarily about the other person.  All insights tarot may have are for you to consider about yourself, your thoughts, your feelings and your future actions.  While it may certainly help you better understand someone else, ultimately you are the one in control of your choices and responses.

A tarot relationship reading can help one be better prepared for making those decisions.  It can affirm what you may already be feeling about what to do.  It can calm the freakouts and allow you to rationally and somewhat objectively assess your next move.  The finest benefit is that it creates a time for you to re-evaluate your own feelings and whether or not you want to continue pursuing a relationship with that other person.  It serves the querant best when it is viewed as a way to feel more empowered in a situation where fifty percent of the interaction is entirely out of one's control.  Because ultimately, you are in the drivers seat of your own life and that includes your relationship choices.